Ok Addictions (Part C): Connect Pleasure and Purpose
This is the third in a four-part series on OK addictions.
Over 10% of American adults are addicted to a problem: cocaine, gaming, cigarettes, excessive shopping. A lot of people reach for pleasure but find pain. OK addictions are never problems; they add to your quality of life in the long run. Things like being
A Fitness Freak
A Chess Nut
Hooked On Hockey
Addicted to Having Good Friends
A Serious Sunset Seeker
A Doco-Movie Maniac
OK addictions build character skills for life. They connect pleasure and purpose.
Nature Connects Pleasure & Purpose
Everything in life has a purpose. The bottom line is that mother nature wants us all to survive. She uses pleasure to help us survive and enjoy life long-term. This is the natural purpose of pleasure. Here’s how mother nature connects pleasure and purpose.
FOOD. The pleasure of nutritious foods – tasting great – encourages us to eat. This is healthy and is connected to the purpose of survival. Yours.
SEX. The pleasures of sex – orgasm, closeness, love and no loneliness – encourage us to have sex. This keeps you connected while giving nature a chance to spawn a future generation for our collective survival.
LOVE AND FRIENDSHIP. The pleasures of love and friendship – feeling warm and understood, being accepted and less lonely – encourage us to be sociable and live together well. This is connected to the purpose our collective survival, for if we continue to hate, we just won’t survive.
LAUGHTER, RELAXING and PLAY. The pleasures of laughter, play, relaxing and enjoying life are connected to our individual and collective well being; physical, mental and emotional. Ultimately, this too is for our survival.
CONTRIBUTION. The pleasure of your contribution to society, making the sale, teaching, making a product, rendering a service, volunteering or taking care of others – a sense of achievement – is connected to the purpose of helping each other in society to ensure our collective survival.
Yep. Any way you look at it, life naturally connects pleasure and purpose for survival. There is, however, a catch. To gain the pleasure you have to put in the effort:
To eat, you have to grow, harvest, transport and prepare food.
To have loving sex you have to find and work on a relationship.
To have friends, you’ll have to cultivate friendship and social skills.
To laugh and play together we have to cultivate good relationships.
To contribute takes the effort of finding a job or something and turning up.
The pleasure is always worth the effort. Nature makes sure of this by filling your brain with a DOSE of feel-good brain chemicals like Dopamine, Oxytocin, Serotonin and Endorphins after you put in the effort. This encourages you to keep putting in the effort, for the purpose, for the pleasure. It connects pleasure and purpose. If you keep this connection, it can drive you forward for a lifetime of pleasure and purpose.
But! There’s a problem: our lazy brain that wants pleasure without the effort, without the purpose. We disconnect pleasure and purpose to avoid the effort. Give me the pleasure, hold the purpose and effort.
Our society is finding more ways of disconnecting pleasure, purpose and effort. Street drugs have a lot of pleasure but no purpose. The costs is high: money, side-effects, nagging parents, health issues and even death. Gambling disconnects pleasure from purpose by promising you money without effort. The cost can be financial ruin and losing your family. We get sucked into these and other addictions because our brains enjoy dopamine hits without effort.
Dopamine in your brain
Anybody can get addicted. Anyone with a brain. Addictions happen because of substances or experiences manipulating brain chemicals, particularly dopamine.
When we learned to manufacture amphetamines in the boot of a car, giant dopamine hits became possible with little effort and no purpose. It feels fantastic for a short while, but your brain gets cheated of long-term pleasure connected to purpose. Your brain thinks it can always get pleasure without purpose, and this contributes to painful cravings and addiction.
Your brain is like a toddler wanting pleasure without purpose: demanding, thoughtless and even self-destructive. Like all children, it needs guidance to survive. You can guide it towards long-term contentment by connecting pleasure and purpose. That’s what OK addictions do.
Pleasure in sport is connected to achievement and health.
Pleasure in playing music is connected to beauty and sharing feelings.
Pleasure in playing chess is connected to sharpening the brain.
Pleasure in cooking is connected to serving and enjoying food.
Pleasure in speaking a language is in communicating with others.
Pleasure in gym fitness is in health and an attractive physique.
Pleasure in volunteering is in helping and serving others.
Find your OK addiction for more pleasure, less pain and to enjoy life, long-term.