The Science of Gratitude (Part One)

Like to be happier and healthier? Well, an attitude of gratitude will help. In this post, we’ll look at the science of gratitude; practical tips come in part two. In my practice, I often encourage someone to cultivate the skill of gratitude.

What is gratitude?

You know the story. It’s 1621 and Pilgrims in New England give thanks. For what? Not just for their Autumn Harvest, but just for being alive thanks to the help from American Indians. Only America has this story: people setting aside differences; sitting down together and giving thanks. This is gratitude. Gratitude is not just saying thanks for help, it’s habitual focussing on things to be grateful for and the main thing is to be grateful for is being alive. Being alive feels great.

Gratitude is not always look on the bright side of life, emphasize the positive, push away negatives and find something good. Sometimes, it isn’t good: I have a chest infection. Great!  Could you make it double pneumonia please? It’s also not delusional hype – life is great, life is great – trying to fool yourself.

Gratitude is something like this:

When I consider all the hurt, the striving and the set-backs, the broken dreams and inadequacies I feel, and when I consider the love I share and all the good things I learn and encounter, it is still wonderful to be alive; life is an amazing experience and I am thankful to be part of it.

You can still be thankful if someone close has died, if you have loved and lost, or if you had crops fail and get through it in 1621.

What are the health benefits of gratitude?

Gratitude protects you against depression, lifts mood and improves well-being.[1] Gratitude is strongly linked to physical and psychological well being.[2] It promotes self-acceptance and good relationships[3] and protects against burnout.[4] The more grateful you are, the healthier and happier you are.[5] This shows a “dose-response” relationship; like if two cups of coffee keep you more awake than one cup, then it’s something in the coffee. Gratitude works so well, it should be used to help people stay well.[6]

Not bad.

How does gratitude help?

Ten ways. With gratitude, you (1) become more social, people like to be around you, and you appreciate people more. That has many health benefits. Gratitude (2) decreases toxic emotions when you compare yourself with others; it (3) helps you fulfil goals (students practicing gratitude in a ten-week trial felt more capable and empowered to get things done); It (4) directly improves your health by decreasing chronic inflammation, and activating your parasympathetic nervous system rather than fight or flight; (5) helps you cope with stress by making you focus on solutions rather than problems; (6) increases self-esteem and grateful people tend to be (7) spiritual and this makes for emotional well-being.

Then, gratitude (8) lessens the material striving which leads to low-self-esteem, unhappiness and dissatisfaction; makes you (9) more inclined to focus on better memories; and (10) helps you treat other people better, making you more social.[7]

That’s a lot of evidence for gratitude.

Who achieves gratitude?

Three groups of people. Firstly, those just born with an ability to be grateful as part of their personality. Secondly, those who have a close brush with mortality; a near-fatal car accident or a heart-attack; the “second chance” helps them look at life differently. And thirdly, those who learn the skill of cultivating gratitude to help change their brain chemicals (that’s what I’ll talk about next post).

Why is it so damn hard to have gratitude?

Five reasons and Five solutions. Gratitude is difficult because of

1. Expectations. If we grow up with more we expect more (Gen Y tend to expect more than people who grew up in the depression). Our brain is also wired to expect more and strive for more: a better future, better survival, a better deal. We expect more even from ourselves. That’s fine. The trick is to compartmentalize your life: want to do better wherever you can, but, in other areas, be grateful for every opportunity and everything that comes your way.

2. Other people who seem to get in the way: I want to win, a job, a relationship but someone else wants them too. How do I be grateful? Competition helps you improve: just ask Roger Federer about Raphael Nadal. Try to appreciate people; every person is a gift to you in some way.

3. Entitlement. Natural self-preservation and self- survive can result in looking after number one and becoming ungrateful. We subjectively see ourselves as the center of the universe, but we objectively know we aren’t. To keep perspective, ask profound questions: what keeps the earth and sun spinning? How did I get good opportunities? Why is our country safe and others not? Why do we have freedom? How did I get parents who fed and nurtured me? Who do I thank for today’s sunshine? How can I make this world a bit better?

4. Comparisons. If we compare ourselves with others, we tend to become vain (if we’re doing well) or bitter (if others are doing better). Here, however, I want you to give yourself choice. Instead of becoming vain or bitter, you can become grateful (when you do well) or humble (when others are doing better). The choice is yours, and it helps you keep perspective: others have more difficult lives.

5. The treadmill: keeping busy, chasing more, wanting more stuff, more experiences, better relationships and not feeling good enough or happy enough. Underlying dissatisfaction drives our busy lives. The answer is to take time out to relax and realize how good we have it: how bad would my problem look if I lived in a war-torn country? in five years’ time?

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[1] Watkins, Philip C., et al. "Gratitude and happiness: Development of a measure of gratitude, and relationships with subjective well-being." Social Behavior and Personality: an international journal 31.5 (2003): 431-451.

[2] Wood & Froh 2009.

[3] Wood, Alex M., Stephen Joseph, and John Maltby. "Gratitude predicts psychological well-being above the Big Five facets." (2009): 443-447.  Wood, Alex M., Jeffrey J. Froh, and Adam WA Geraghty. "Gratitude and well-being: A review and theoretical integration." Clinical psychology review 30.7 (2010): 890-905.

[4] Lanham, Michelle, et al. "How gratitude relates to burnout and job satisfaction in mental health professionals." Journal of Mental Health Counseling 34.4 (2012): 341-354.

our busy livesthers. self-eful?his ived in a war-torn country? How bad will my problem look in five years' certain underlying d

[5] Hill, Patrick L., Mathias Allemand, and Brent W. Roberts. "Examining the pathways between gratitude and self-rated physical health across adulthood." Personality and individual differences 54.1 (2013): 92-96.

[6] Emmons, Robert A., and Robin Stern. "Gratitude as a psychotherapeutic intervention." Journal of clinical psychology 69.8 (2013): 846-855.

[7] Emmons & Mishra 2010