From myth to philosophy to science, we explore “Why are we all so different?” To negotiate diversity we look at this question and why other people can be such a problem and what enlightenment philosophers called “the state of nature.”
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Read MoreA world of diversity seems to be a world of conflict: social upheavals, differing opinions, new rules, confusion, anxiety, disorientation. Is there something we can do, as individuals, to better at negotiating diversity in this world? to understand others? to keep enjoying friendships? to trust strangers? Yes.
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Read MoreDid you know that there were 7 types of love and you can mix them up and get hurt? We can mix up romance with liking sex, friendship with romance, or someone’s kindness with thinking they mean something more. Our personal relationships each have a unique blend of different loves.
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Read MoreIn this podcast we look at ways of how to be a good friend. You can’t choose your family, but you can choose how to be a good friend. We look at what makes this Love Type one of the most easy-going of relationships. We look at what makes a good friend, what makes friendships difficult, what goes on in the brain and how to go deeper.
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Read MoreWhat are you asking: Is it physically possible? do you want permission? Is it a good idea? how to get away with it? In this recording of our Late Night Love Episode, we look at the science and psychology of how and why people cheat and the brain chemicals and hormones driving long-term love, sex and trust.
Read MoreCan I love myself without becoming selfish? What if I don’t even like myself? How do I love myself without becoming narcissistic? We all have selfishness. It’s natural, but narcissism is unhealthy self-love. It keeps you preoccupied with yourself and cuts off from the flow of love with others. Self-compassion is healthy self-love; it keeps love with others flowing.
Read MoreIn our image saturated society, we can become preoccupied with our constructed selves, our false selves. A world of appearance is not good for the brain. Where can you get under the masks, kick off your shoes, go barefoot, and share feel good brain chemicals with people rather than be a rabbit-in-the-headlights? If you could read my mind what a tail my thought would tell? Says Gordon. We talk depression, bulimia and anorexia. To thine own self be true says Shakespeare, but do we know our true selves? Knowing our values helps
In our image saturated society, we can become preoccupied with our constructed selves, our false selves. A world of appearance is not good for the brain. Where can you get under the masks, kick off your shoes, go barefoot, and share feel good brain chemicals with people rather than be a rabbit-in-the-headlights? If you could read my mind what a tail my thought would tell? Says Gordon. We talk depression, bulimia and anorexia. To thine own self be true says Shakespeare, but do we know our true selves? Knowing our values helps
Time to sum up the series and make it actually happen: overcome those useless thoughts everyday. But what works for me? Our brains are unique so unique solutions are needed. To help you find these for yourself, we delve into Brief Solution-Focussed Therapy to do more of what works and less of what doesn’t for your unique brain. Plus a few bonus techniques to celebrate.
How can you get the NACC of being focussed on useful thoughts all day? By cultivating the attitude of gratitude. A simple DOSE of gratitude can give you the DOSE of Dopamine, Oxytocin, Serotonin and Endorphins that your brain needs to have good conversations running between your frontal lobe and your limbic system. It’s focussed neuroplasticity.
The science of neuroplasticity tells us that with new skills our brain changes. In this podcast, we will use the principles of neuroplasticity – learning and practice, rewards, use it or lose it, what fires together wires together, neurons out of sync fail to link – to build a new roadway to the new thoughts you want to have.
Mindfulness can help overcome useless thoughts if you get the NACC: NOTICE your thoughts to be AWARE of them and CHOOSE to CONCENTRATE on thoughts you want. Specifically, we’ll use seven MINDFUL techniques: Meditate, Inhale & exhale, Notice the NACC, Do what you’re doing, Focus on your Five senses, Unwind and relax, and Listen deeply.
We’ll expose the roots of your useless thoughts. Are they from your childhood? Did someone else put them there? Are they driven from your unconscious mind? Psychoanalysis has some insights that are relevant to us here. We explore six insights for you to understand, accept, resolve, forgive and let go so you can choose to concentrate what’s useful.
Useless thoughts? So what. Leave them alone. Let them be. Let them sulk in a corner of your mind while you get on with what you want to do in life. Easier said than done, but it’s possible if you can accept your thoughts, separate from your thoughts, value your values, commit to living out your values and noticing it all
You are separate from your thoughts. They have their story, you have yours. They’re the problem, you’re not. Writing creative stories can equip you to capture your thoughts and direct them towards your preferred thought-life. You have important allies in your battle against useless thoughts: your values, your skills, and people who care.
By doing something active and useful we can make ourselves feel capable and useful. This generates a bunch of useful thoughts to crowd out the useless thoughts. It can be fun to BE A DOER and be rewarded for it. Acquire skills, exercise, and do anything useful to find an antidote to useless thoughts.
Our thoughts have power over us because we believe them. Why not challenge their authority instead? Here we put thoughts through the wringer of logic, keeping emotions out, understanding what we can & can’t control, and proactively working on them. We find COLDMOP errors and correct them by ANT EATing.
Negative thinking is not always useless and positive thinking is not always useful. This is discussed by an important story. We then start applying the two basic thought skills to help you notice your thoughts and start working on them to help make your mind a better place to be. We start chucking out some garbage: garbage out!
First part in a new series on overcoming negative and useless thoughts. What we think and feel determine much of our quality of life. Here we look at what are thoughts, some scientific and philosophical ideas about thoughts and some models of the brain: it’s more like a vibrant city than a computer. The two basic thought skills are introduced.
This episode is the recording of a live talk we did in 2019 entitled ‘Are you listening?’ In this talk you’ll hear about
What listening is and isn’t , the Science of listening and get some really practical skills for active listening.
